In your children, you can see the way they will relate as adults
In your children, you can see the way they will relate as adults
How can we identify attachment style in childhood? What is the Strange Situation, and how can it help parents understand their child’s attachment style? Why is the “secure” attachment style preferable for creating healthy relationships in adulthood?
It is during childhood that different attachment profiles develop, which later determine the quality of relationships established in adult life. Based on this concept, by observing children and how they interact with their caregivers, it is possible to identify the type of bond they tend to form and, if necessary, with the help of a professional, intervene to redirect them toward a healthy attachment style.
One experiment designed to investigate these dynamics is called the Strange Situation, developed by Mary Ainsworth. She observed mother–child interactions and the child’s behavior in a room where only the mother and the child were present. Later, a stranger was introduced into the room to interact first with the mother and then with the child. Finally, the mother was asked to leave the room, leaving the child with the stranger, and then to return.
What does the Strange Situation analyze?
- The child’s ability to explore a new environment when in the presence of the mother (does the child move away? stay close? reject the mother?).
- The child’s reactions when a stranger enters the room and interacts first with the mother and then with the child.
- The child’s behavior and coping strategies when the mother leaves the room and they are left alone with the stranger (do they stay calm? cry or scream?).
- The child’s reactions when the parent re-enters the room, allowing researchers to assess the final attachment profile.
Which profiles emerge from the Strange Situation?
From Ainsworth’s experiments, four main attachment profiles were identified:
- Secure attachment: the child explores the environment while occasionally seeking reassurance from the mother. When she leaves, the child protests mildly and is easily comforted upon her return. The caregiver is sensitive and attentive, making the child feel secure.
- Insecure–avoidant attachment: the child shows little interest in the mother’s presence or absence. This profile is typical when the caregiver is emotionally unavailable or rejecting.
- Insecure–ambivalent attachment: the child has difficulty exploring, clinging to the caregiver. When the caregiver leaves, the child cries desperately, and when she returns, the child is not easily comforted, sometimes showing contradictory behaviors. This occurs when caregivers are inconsistent in their responses.
- Disorganized attachment: the child appears confused, alternating between fear and disorientation, both toward the environment and the caregiver. This profile often develops in the context of abusive or severely neglectful caregivers.
Secure attachment as the foundation for healthy relationships
The study clearly shows that secure attachment is the only “healthy dependency” in the mother–child relationship. All other styles indicate problems rooted in poor synchrony between child and caregiver.
However, it is important to remember that with targeted work—starting with the parents—it is possible to modify a child’s attachment style, supporting them in becoming a secure, well-adjusted adult capable of building happy and healthy relationships later in life.
Online therapy can be a valuable tool to help one or both parents address their child’s attachment style and support its transformation.
For more information, contact Dr. Jessica Zecchini.
Email consulenza@jessicazecchini.it, Whatsapp 370 32 17 351
