Sapiosexuality: the intelligence that attracts
Sapiosexuality: the intelligence that attracts
What is sapiosexuality? Why are intelligence and intellect the basis for good sexual chemistry? What can online therapy do?
Sapiosexuals are individuals attracted to intelligence. This trait, in fact, has a greater impact than beauty or social status. The quality of conversations with the other person can make such people feel more interested, enriched, in intimacy with their interlocutor. Physical desire, therefore, can also go beyond outward appearance.
By sapiosexuality we mean the charm that wisdom has over interlocutors. An interesting and stimulating dialogue can become a scene of flirting, understanding, allure—an effective winning weapon to seduce the sapiosexual. Intellectuality thus transforms into eroticism. This concept was already taken up by the ancient Greeks, around 380 AD, where in his “Symposium’’ he mentioned how growing love indeed started from the body, but then reached the highest peaks with the intellect.
Sapiosexuality is not pedantry or a concept to denigrate or discriminate against those who do not fit school standards. It is therefore not a matter of knowing everything. Rather, it is a living exchange, made up of reflections, points of view, a form of intimacy that, arising from the intellect, creates emotions and connections with the other through words.
Sapiosexuality: testimonials
We report here an interesting article published by the New York Times, which in 2017 collected testimonies from several self-described “sapiosexual’’ people.
Most said they felt frustrated because of virtual interactions; often the exchange of photos or trivial thoughts via social media makes them uncomfortable in getting to know someone, preferring a broader interaction that explores topics in a skillful, brilliant way, thus igniting their attraction, curiosity and interest.
Another Australian study reports that a slice corresponding to 8% of the population between the ages of 18 and 35 define themselves as sapiosexual; later including adults up to age 45. Intelligence becomes for these individuals a basic factor for sexual attraction. Words, their use, the ability to communicate but also to reflect, to empathize, make men and women more fascinating, as they move away from banalities and conventions to establish a deeper and more intimate connection that thus opens the door to true attraction.
How to tell if you are a sapiosexual?
- Intellectual affinity matters a lot to you: physical appearance, charisma, can attract but take a back seat if the relationship is not then increased and teased by the intellect;
- intellectual dialogues turn you on: talking about politics, literature, current events, history or other intellectual topics dear to you excites you; there is even a certain form of enjoyment in engaging in such debates with the other person; you remain involved and absorbed;
- you don’t feel sexual chemistry without intellectual chemistry: without an intellectual, intelligent discussion that grabs you, physical alchemy doesn’t develop either; in sapiosexuals everything is a perfect balance in which the preliminary part becomes precisely the intellectual connection;
- without an intellectual spark there is no access to attraction: in this regard we cite the difference between sapiosexuality, characterized precisely by a strong attraction to intellectual understanding, and demisexuality, in which the individual is interested in the other only after having built a solid emotional/romantic connection. The difference is that the sapiosexual becomes sexually attracted to the other person, but only after having experienced intellectual fulfillment.
What can online therapy do?
Online therapy is useful first of all to understand that sometimes one must fully understand family patterns in order to find the right person; in fact, a certain family pattern can lead us to find a person very similar to our experience, automatically to a parent or a caregiving figure, making unconscious choices. These searches, however, do not always lead to finding the person who is congenial to us on a soul level. Online therapy can therefore serve to analyze and bring to awareness unconscious family patterns; guiding us toward true love.
For information write to Dr. Jessica Zecchini.
Email contact consulenza@jessicazecchini.it, whatsapp contact 370 32 17 351
