Male Depression and Online Therapy: Why Talking About It Is Still a Taboo
Male Depression and Online Therapy: Why Talking About It Is Still a Taboo
What Do We Mean by Male Depression?
Looking at statistics on gender differences in the prevalence of mental disorders, depression is still diagnosed more frequently in women than in men. At first glance, this might suggest that men do not suffer from depression—as if being male were a protective factor against mood disorders. However, this is a distorted view that stems from men’s difficulty in recognizing depression when it appears. The reluctance to seek help from a professional becomes the very factor that allows symptoms to persist and worsen over time.
When a man is depressed, he often feels he is losing the values tied to traditional masculine stereotypes: independence and the role of family provider. As a result, he may withdraw from communication with his partner, engage in behaviors that worsen the condition, and deny that there is a problem that needs to be addressed. The more strongly a man identifies with the traditional model of heterosexual masculinity, the more taboo it becomes to talk about emotional or psychological problems. Physical illness or injury, by contrast, are considered more “acceptable,” since in this traditional framework only women—deemed “emotionally fragile”—are allowed to openly acknowledge emotional suffering.
Male vs. Female Depression: What Are the Differences?
Depression presents with essentially the same symptoms in both men and women. Common signs include:
- Reduced ability to concentrate or make decisions
- Rumination on past mistakes, with self-blame and feelings of worthlessness
- Persistent sadness and anxiety, described as a “pain of living”
- Loss of pleasure in activities or hobbies once enjoyed
- Social withdrawal, constant worry, decreased sexual desire
- Fatigue and exhaustion, even without physical activity
- Changes in appetite and weight (increase or decrease)
- Sleep disturbances: insomnia, frequent awakenings, or hypersomnia
- Psychomotor retardation (slowed thinking, speech, or movement) or psychomotor agitation (restlessness without purpose)
- Physical symptoms such as headaches, muscle or joint pain, abdominal pain, tachycardia, dizziness, or digestive problems
These symptoms may appear subtly and not always simultaneously in the same individual.
The difference lies mainly in how depression manifests. For women, it is often tied to profound feelings of loss—emotional or relational. The depressive episode may serve as a defense against the disintegration of the self in response to grief or rupture.
In men, depression is more often associated with work-related stress, relationship problems, family conflicts, or feelings of failure, and it is accompanied by a higher incidence of suicide compared to women.
How Men Manifest Depression: Cultural and Gender Differences
Cultural norms, social expectations, and lifestyle differences shape the way men express depression. Women can often play a key role in recognizing these symptoms in their partners and encouraging them to seek professional help.
Men with depression often change their behavior in ways that differ from women, for example:
- Avoiding family and social relationships
- Abusing or mistreating partners and children, sometimes escalating into domestic violence
- Overworking obsessively
- Developing addictions (alcohol, drugs, gambling)
- Engaging in risky behaviors (reckless driving, unsafe sex)
- Showing sudden, unjustified aggression
- Experiencing sexual dysfunctions, either through loss of interest or aggression during sex
- Shutting down emotionally and refusing dialogue
These behaviors are often perceived as more “acceptable” within the traditional male role model—where aggression and risk-taking are tolerated—than showing emotional vulnerability. Unfortunately, this cultural view prevents men from acknowledging the problem, sometimes making it nearly impossible for their partners to help without harming themselves in the process.
Men need to accept that depression can affect anyone. Seeking help does not mean being weak or “less of a man.” On the contrary, addressing depression can prevent devastating outcomes such as self-harm or even suicide.
How Online Psychological Therapy Can Help Men with Depression
Men struggling with depression often hesitate to seek help from a mental health professional, fearing it will be seen as a sign of weakness. Online psychological therapy can remove this barrier by offering treatment in a private, personalized space—without exposure to social judgment.
The main fear men face is being perceived as weak by their family or partner. Walking into a therapist’s office may feel like a defeat, but online therapy allows them to begin treatment discreetly, preserving a sense of autonomy while ensuring confidentiality.
Through approaches such as systemic-relational therapy and brief strategic therapy, online sessions can help reconstruct the history of the problem, identify when depression first appeared, and progressively restore decision-making capacity and life goals—while eliminating the symptoms that maintain the disorder.
In some cases, a partner’s involvement can be invaluable. Suggesting couples therapy online can accelerate recovery and reduce resistance, while also helping both partners address relational difficulties together.
Final Thoughts
Male depression remains a taboo largely because of outdated stereotypes that equate emotional suffering with weakness. Yet men deserve the same freedom as women to speak about their struggles and seek help without stigma.
Online psychological therapy represents a powerful opportunity to reach men who might otherwise never set foot in a therapist’s office. It offers privacy, accessibility, and the chance to begin a path toward recovery—without fear of judgment.
