BDSM: fantasies and biopsychosocial perspectives
BDSM: fantasies and biopsychosocial perspectives
What does the acronym BDSM mean? What biological, psychological, and cultural traits identify a BDSM personality? What can online therapy do?
BDSM (Bondage and Discipline; Dominance and Submission) consists of a sexual and psychological practice, a role-playing game that is increasingly widespread, whose acronym, translated, stands for “bondage and discipline” – “sadism and masochism.”
This role-playing game, with not only sexual but also psychological characteristics, can take place either in a group or in a couple, where the parties are adults and above all consensual.
The roles and parts in the couple or in the group can be fixed, or flexible and interchangeable among the participants. Power and its exchange between the parties is the central pivot of this discipline. This exchange of submission and dominance can occur in a wide range of role plays, rituals, or expressions, such as precise commands (for example making the other kneel), use of terms to refer to the other (such as “mistress,” or “slave”), use of immobilization or imprisonment techniques (cages, ties, handcuffs); sensory restriction (for example blindfolding the eyes), or humiliations (such as insults, demands, punishments).
This practice is increasingly valued in literature as well, taking on a new light, less pathological or judgmental. Today’s statistics report how BDSM is a common practice among educated and/or intellectual people, often with at least a university degree, mostly belonging to urban contexts. A recent study from Belgium has sought to provide a first systematic review regarding this discipline in order to try to gather and define it from a biopsychosocial point of view (thus taking into account the biological, psychological, and social factors that come into play when talking about BDSM personalities).
Fantasies or everyday life
The research has pointed out first of all how, in part, the interest related to BDSM remains confined to a fantasy often unexplored; on the other hand, there exists a subgroup, albeit limited, that actively practices such role-plays, involving also other aspects of daily life 24/7. In most cases, data show how the majority of the population has had at least once in life BDSM-related fantasies; but that only half of them have put them into practice at least once in their life or in their relationship.
Hence the distinction between those who see BDSM as a form of entertainment and those who see it as a real orientation, a way of identifying themselves.
Let us try to outline what are the most common factors that identify the BDSM personality, the biological, psychological, and cultural traits that, throughout one’s life, lead to a greater predisposition and interest in such practices; while underlining that research in this field is still a subject of study and in continuous evolution.
Biological factors:
- Initially BDSM was seen as a functional mating strategy. According to statistics, men most frequently represent the dominant role, women seem to cover or prefer mostly roles of submission and/or restraint. Influencing this result is biological sex, according to which predominantly dominant men and predominantly submissive women are able to perceive each other as more attractive, favoring the birth of biological offspring.
- Another biological factor that influences BDSM and its orientation is the brain circuits of pain and reward. Even though it is thought that they may be modifiable over time, they nevertheless feed the central pivot of such practices and thus the exchange of power. This activity could therefore affect the desire to remain “submissive” or to want to take on the role of “master” or “mistress.” As far as studies are concerned, it has emerged that through functional magnetic resonance imaging, masochistic personalities showed feeling less pain even during the viewing of videos or images with masochistic themes.
- Age: age of the participant also seems to affect the choice of role. Mature age is more often associated with a dominant role compared to a younger age (whose interest seems more oriented toward submission). Obviously this age-related phenomenon is modifiable and variable as it progresses. Other researchers suggest that this preference may also change depending on social or cultural factors experienced over the years.
Psychological factors:
- BDSM professionals (master/mistress) report, according to studies, greater extroversion, greater trust in relationships, openness to new experiences, less emotional instability, less sensitivity to rejection, less need for approval.
- On the other hand, in sexual masochism (submissive roles), a greater predisposition to borderline disorder and, paradoxically, higher levels of narcissism have emerged. This association will certainly need to be expanded by future studies.
- Parenting styles: attachment styles dating back to childhood and the couple example received from our parents are also among the accredited hypotheses for the preference for a given role in BDSM practices. At present it is thought that the awareness of a more authoritative figure in the parental couple influences the child’s view in determining who has the right, precisely, to the dominant role even in future sexual or couple practices.
- Sexual traumas: further research finally suggests the proximity of sexual trauma to greater interest in BDSM practice (still under study).
Cultural factors:
- It is thought that urban areas and a distinctly liberal environment (think of large cities such as Berlin, London, etc.) may contribute more to embarking on a BDSM lifestyle.
- Higher levels of education and open-mindedness.
- Greater opportunities to come into contact with BDSM culture (both in person, such as in groups and associations, and online), which contribute to destigmatizing such forms of sexual expression by questioning the place of BDSM, gradually distancing it from psychopathologies.
What can online therapy do?
Online therapy can help couples who practice or intend to practice BDSM first of all to probe the presence or absence of psychopathologies that could turn such role-play into a harmful or dangerous practice.
With online therapy it is indeed possible to define one’s type of personality linked to one’s pattern and family background (both individually and as a couple), to exclude the possibility of establishing a BDSM sadomasochistic couple with a neurotic transaction, capable of replicating traumas learned during childhood and bringing them back into role-play, turning it into a dangerous or even lethal relationship (or BDSM practice).
For information, write to Dr. Jessica Zecchini.
Email contact: consulenza@jessicazecchini.it, WhatsApp contact: 370 32 17 351
